Living like a Darling means finding ways to add charm to your day.
Every day, Darla and Blossom endeavour to find some way to enhance their lives, whether it be something large (such as a nice spa day, mmm) or something small (a bath, a walk, a meeting with a friend, a new recipe or - oops - wearing some extremely pretty lingerie).
Here we will add, from time to time, some of our own hints and experiences for bringing a little extra charm into your life.
Darla, as Darling Fashionista, has hints and tips for letting out the Inner God/dess, and Blossom can usually mix up something to soothe ills and bring back some sparkle.
We are always keen to hear the hints and tips from our Charming Friends as well! Send them to us at thedarlingsisters@live.com.
What is a cocktail?
Cocktails are mixed drinks: it is that simple! (Well, not that simple, as plain liqueurs and spirits are often served as ‘cocktails’ these days — and why not?)
Cocktails as we know them have been around since the early nineteenth century. There is debate about where the expression ‘cocktail’ came from – possibly a term used to describe a type of horse with a docked tail, or from a particular rooster-shaped drink dispenser.
One thing is certain: that in the twentieth century cocktail culture came into its own. Knowing how to make, order and drink cocktails is very very good, even if you prefer not to drink alcohol.
People are often defined in terms of the drinks they choose. This includes popular characters: imagine James Bond without his Vodka Martini, Carrie Bradshaw without her Cosmopolitan or Maxwell Smart without his Gibson!
Think about it: which cocktail defines you?
Blossom recommends that you develop a taste for some of the classics, modern and vintage alike. Some cocktails are classier than others: screen sirens and matinee idols do not drink Orgasms!
Importantly, do try never, ever to order one of those drinks that has a crude rude name: you know the ones. Not only are the drinks generally nasty, overly sweet concoctions suitable only for those who are not acclimatized to decent alcohol, but it is not at all charming to perpetuate the evil that was thus inflicted on the Cocktail Culture of the 20th century. Remember that your cocktail choice can define your public persona!
There are literally thousands of recipes in circulation and more being created every day. Why not learn a few mixing techniques and have a go at creating your own?
It is wise to get a feel for your own preferred style of drink, and learn how they are made and ordered, to avoid Bad Cocktail Experiences.
Working your way through the cocktail list in order, or trying too many different varieties in one night, is pretty much a guaranteed Bad Cocktail Experience.
Blossom recommends that all charming people should learn how to mix and order a small repertoire of classics and modern favourites. You will find some of her favourites added here from time to time.
Don’t forget ‘mocktails’ – delicious mixed drinks that do not contain alcohol should be provided at every function and half-decent cocktail bar.
During cocktail hour, ladies traditionally wear shorter skirts: to the knee or just below. The LBD (little black dress) is perfect for this occasion.
Gentlemen traditionally wear a lounge/business suit, or trousers with a dressy shirt made in a luxurious fabric and colour. Blossom and Darla adore men who wear French cuffs! There is no immediate requirement to wear a tie unless you wish to.
Ladies and gentlemen in Australia should aim for ‘simple chic’ and leave elaborate, ornate accessories for dinner engagements. Cufflinks and nice earrings are great, bowties and fascinators are trying a little too hard!
If you have been invited for cocktails leading to dinner, dress for the dinner rather than the cocktails.
At Australian specialty cocktail bars you can be a little more creative about what you wear, but avoid overly casual clothes such as jeans, sneakers, t-shirts or polos. It is a compliment to the staff and other patrons if you make an effort to dress up for the occasion. Wear something nice that suits you and makes you feel fabulous and you will be fine.
Ladies, bear in mind that in a cocktail bar you will usually be expected to perch on a low, precarious ottoman or stool. Very short skirts are perilous in this situation — be prepared!
Here are a few handy little techniques to master if you wish to wow your friends at the next cocktail night …
Stirring
This is a topic close to Blossom’s heart. Never shake gin. It does change the flavour, and not in a nice way. A good rule of thumb is never to shake any clear drink (Martinis, Vodkatinis etc.): stirring retains the clarity of the drink and makes it far more attractive (sorry, Mr Bond). To stir a drink, pour it over cubed ice in a shaker and stir it for up to 20 seconds. Stirring thickens the texture of the drink, obviously makes it pleasantly cold, and dilutes the alcohol very slightly, which can make it more palatable (with a very pure alcohol such as vodka, too much dilution is undesirable—so don’t use cracked or shaved ice). Obtain a long-handled bar spoon and learn how to use it, or use a swizzle and do the job well.
Shaking
Tom Cruise did it one way. A true screen siren or hepcat does it another. Shaking a drink over ice in a cocktail shaker mixes ingredients, cools and thickens them, and looks fantastic if you do it in a suitably insouciant way. This is important: all drinks that contain fruit juice, eggs, milk or cream, should be shaken: these ingredients are relatively difficult to mix and shaking is far more efficient than stirring. A classic shaken cocktail is the Pina Colada with its fruit juice and coconut cream. Flicking the shaker into the air and rolling it down your arm is completely optional and should be approached with caution: your gorgeous tweed or velvet could be at risk and if you drop the shaker you will look like a nitwit. Shake over cubed or cracked ice: never use shaved ice in a shaker.
Building
Some old-fashioned recipes mention ‘building’ a drink. This is simply when you put the ingredients directly into the glass, then stir them briefly (2 – 3 times). An example of a built drink might be a Screwdriver, a Whisky Sour or a Gimlet. Most built drinks are intended to be served in a highball: learn about the drink in advance to be on the safe side as some use old-fashioned glasses instead. Use a narrow straw (sip stick) to stir, then serve the straw with the drink if it is for a lady (this protects her lipstick). Gentlemen, if you are served a drink with a straw, remove the straw. (Unless you are wearing lipstick, obviously.)* If you think that your male recipient will enjoy stirring the drink a little more, serve the drink in a highball with a swizzle stick. If your built drink includes a wedge of lime, squeeze it into the glass before you add the other ingredients. Other fruits are added later (unless they are muddled, see below).
* Ladies, if you don't want a straw, simply say so. And gentlemen, please indicate if you would prefer a straw. The addition of straws to ladies' drinks by bar staff is not intended to be a sexist gesture: it is simply a traditional method of serving drinks to persons who may or may not choose to wear lippie. As we know, both ladies and gentlemen occasionally enjoy a bit of lip-enhancement - and otherwise. Therefore, don't assume that the bar staff means anything by what they do, simply politely request what you want. Simple, and nobody gets offended.
Layering
A layered drink is called a Pousse-Café. Simply using this term casually around those in the know will make you seem very hip indeed. An example of a popular Pousse-Café is the nefarious B-52. Pousse-Cafés are intended for a specific type of glass (called, in fact, a Pousse-Café) but you can make them in any glass that is not too great in capacity. One useful thing to remember is that the drink will be more successful if the glass has less surface area, so go for a narrow glass rather than a wide-mouthed one. Port and liqueur glasses can work well. The reason that liquors separate into layers is that they have different densities. Generally speaking, those with more sugar have greater density and those with more alcohol have lesser density. It is possible to find relative density charts for most major liquors—however be warned: different manufacturers produce beverages with different densities, so not all Triple Secs will be the same. Prior experimentation is your best bet. To layer drinks, pour them in order with the densest at the bottom. A good technique is to pour gently over the back of a spoon that is touching the glass just above the liquid layer. This will reduce accidental mixing. Apologies to those who adore B-52s, but a Pousse-Café is intended to be sipped, not slammed. Each layer should be enjoyed on its own. A word to the charming: these are really best served at home. They are very annoying for busy bartenders! And a word to the wise home Mixologist: more than three layers will send you demented!
Blending
Seemingly easy: pop the ingredients in a blender with ice and press the button and voila! A lovely alcoholic slushy. (One of the most popular blended cocktails is the Strawberry Daquiri, which is like a lovely strawberry slushy – so very pretty!) However even this is fraught with peril. Get an industrial strength blender. A cheap blender will not withstand the ice and bits of broken blade in drinks will not endear you to your friends. Never fill a blender more than halfway. Always cover before blending (but you already knew that). Do not use cubed ice: even the best blenders will eventually break. And shaved ice will melt due to friction: cracked ice is your only workable option. To crack ice at home put cubed ice into a (very clean) tea towel, cover with a fold of the cloth and hit it a few times with a hammer. Most blended drinks should only take around 20 – 30 seconds of blending: more if there are still lumps of ice visible.
Muddling
This is where you mash solid ingredients (such as sugar, mint leaves or fruit) in the bottom of the glass before topping with liquid. If the muddled ingredients (sugar, mint) are fairly dry, add a little liquid such as bitters or fruit juice to allow it to muddle correctly. How to muddle: pop the ingredients to be mashed into the bottom of a sturdy glass: an old-fashioned or highball is best. Give the ingredients a jolly good mashing with a wooden or steel muddling spoon, a pestle, or the back of a spoon. Make sure the ingredients are really well and truly crushed before adding the rest of the drink. Muddled drinks are adorable, if only because of the use of the word ‘muddle’. Muddle, muddle, muddle. For some reason, it makes Blossom think of donkeys ...
Flaming
Ladies and gentlemen, this is really fraught with peril. Blossom highly recommends leaving it to the professional bar person … and certainly never, ever attempt it at home if you’ve already had a few. Your attempts are likely to range from pathetic failures to nasty burns … or even very serious injuries to you, your guests, your clothing or your home. Anyway, flamed drinks are fussy and over-done, and rarely taste as good as they should. Leave them to the determined-to-get-wasted boors and silly trendy kids and just order something you like.
However, if you find yourself in one of those situations where you have to order a flamed drink (perhaps you are accompanying friends on a night out and not to do so would seem rude) remember to quench the flame before you sip!
Not Drinking Alcohol is perfectly acceptable for hepcats and screen goddesses — in fact, it is mandatory if you wish to end the evening cheerily waving goodbye while dashing off on your Vespa or your red convertible. (Do remember the late Isadora Duncan and ensure that your long scarf is tucked well away out of danger.)
Being responsible does not condemn you to a life of mineral water or lemon, lime and bitters. Have fun and experiment with Mocktails! If you have a particular favourite don’t hesitate to request it from your bartender, however do be prepared to provide the recipe if requested. Note to those who do enjoy alcohol: if a member of your party has offered to be Designated Driver it is polite to buy them a Mocktail to say thank you.
Give your guests adequate warning. Two or three weeks before your party is a good time to issue invitations. A themed evening is a lot of fun, but something as simple as ‘come over for cocktails’ will always go down well. Bear in mind that your guests need to eat: plan your event before dinner and provide food afterwards, or ask guests over after dinner (which means at least 8 pm).
Ask your friends to dress up a bit. You will all have more fun. Clean the house up a bit beforehand and make sure it smells nice: aromatic oils or scented candles work well. Make sure the lighting is low. Put Louis or Lady Day on the stereo.
Provide nibblies. Make them small enough to pop into a lipsticked mouth in one go, or else supply little plates and plenty of horizontal space and coasters so that your friends can put their drinks down. Savouries are best before dinner; sweets, fruits and cheeses are popular afterwards.
A cocktail night can be very expensive. In Australia it is okay to ask very good friends to ‘bring a bottle’ but do specify what sort of bottle, whether it be a spirit or a mixer. If you are inviting people you don’t know well, do cover the costs yourself.
The best way to save your sanity is to have a pre-planned cocktail list. Blossom’s rule is to have no less than three options (one of which should be non-alcoholic) and no more than eight (two of which should be non-alcoholic). More than that and you run the risk of unbridled experimentation on the part of your friends. If this is not the point of the evening, it generally leads to a Bad Cocktail Experience
Have fun: print your cocktail list on little cards for your friends to peruse, or else get a blackboard for your ‘drinks specials’.
If you have only three drinks on your list go for one sweet, one dry and one mocktail.
If you have more than three, aim for a mix of sweet and fruity, sweet and creamy, citrussy, dry, and non-alcoholic. If people are cautious they can stick with mixers such as lemonade, champagne and mineral water.
Try to limit the number of different liquors that you use. A good cocktail list includes no more than two spirits, no more than three liqueurs, and assorted mixers. Try a vodka-and-rum night, or a gin-and-whiskey-and-cointreau night. Add mixers such as sparking wine, vermouth, soft drinks and fruit juices. Limiting your ingredients will encourage you to get creative—and not break your budget!
Don’t forget that you need sufficient glasswear to allow your guests to sample their drinks at leisure. If you need to, ask guests to keep track of their own glasses, and include those sweet little widgets for keeping track of stemmed glasses.
Try to organize your party such that before your guests arrive you have the following ready to go: trays with a few pre-mixed drinks so there isn't a queue at the bar or mixing station (don’t forget glasses and napkins); nibblies in an easily accessed place with small plates or napkins; a fridge or icebox in which your friends can place their beverage offerings; a place for guests’ coats and handbags.
If your friends and guests are smokers and you don’t like smoking in your home, don’t turf the poor things into the cold or make them feel bad for their habit. Provide an outdoors smoking area that is sheltered and comfortable. Ensure that there are ashtrays and matches available. A very thoughtful touch is to add a bottle of port or brandy and a few snifters. Do everything you can to make all of your guests as comfortable as possible all the time. Remember to keep a taxi company phone number handy!
Here you will find some of Blossom's favourite classic cocktail recipes.
Please note that these are not the only versions of these recipes around. You can find all manner of variations with a simple web search. These happen to be the versions that Blossom uses at home. It is a good idea to play around and do a bit of your own tasting, so that you can settle on your very own 'house style'.
A true classic that confers instant cool-status on anybody who orders one. Give it a try and enjoy. It practically sings ‘Fly Me To the Moon’ on its own.
Build into an old-fashioned glass over ice cubes and garnish with a lime wedge. Click your fingers groovily.
This is a very popular French aperitif, served in homes and bistros across France. It is berry-fruity, crisp and slightly dry, and will enhance your appetite for a glorious meal. It is also a gorgeous colour. Completely cool for both gentlemen and ladies. The Kir is made with wine, the Kir Royale with sparkling wine or Champagne.
Build into a wineglass or flute. Serve un-garnished, or with a single blackberry in the bottom of the glass.
The Martini is Blossom's favourite cocktail.
This recipe is for a dry Martini. Blossom actually prefers extra-dry (the barest hint of vermouth) with London gin, and a lemon peel garnish. Taste a few and decide how you prefer yours, then accept no substitutes. One piece of advice is to figure out in advance if you prefer London or Plymouth gin. Either variety is acceptable. However, you should never accept a gin Martini that has been shaken. Yuk.
Stir gin and vermouth over ice then strain into a pre-chilled martini glass. Add two olives on a pick, or a twist of lemon peel. Serve with a napkin.
So simple, really tasty and refreshing! The bitters does add a teeny touch of alcohol — not sufficient to even register for most people, but if you avoid alcohol for religious reasons replace the bitters with a good squeeze of lemon rind directly into the glass: the lemon oil from the rind makes a tasty alternative.
Place peel into a Collins glass with a few ice cubes. Pour ginger ale and bitters into glass and stir lightly.
This is a very common ingredient in many cocktails. Sometimes modern bartenders will replace it with a sugar cube, but this is not the best substitute as it changes the flavour and texture of the drink. Make a batch of simple syrup and freeze it in small quantities so that you will always have it to hand: it will last about two months in the fridge or four months in the freezer.
Bring the water to a simmer in a saucepan, add the sugar and stir constantly until the sugar is completely dissolved. Allow the syrup to cool to room temperature before storing it in a clean lidded container.
A cheat’s version, if you need syrup quickly, is to thoroughly mix two parts castor or pure icing sugar with one part hot water from the kettle, allow to cool slightly then add one part cold water. This doesn’t have quite such a nice texture but it will do in a hurry.
Many cocktails require specific glasswear. Different glasses can have different effects on the temperature, sparkle or crispness of a cocktail. Furthermore many cocktails are partially defined by the glass in which they are served. An example is the Martini with its eponymous stemmed wide-mouthed glass.
Most good cocktail bars in Australia should have a good selection of glasswear including the martini (or cocktail), the highball, the old-fashioned, the balloon (or snifter), the shot, the zombie (or hurricane), the flute, the pony, the Pousse-Café (which also works for sherry and liqueurs), various beer glasses, and red and white wine glasses.
(And then there's the beer glasses, which as we know tend to change capacity and name between different States and Territories. Blossom is no expert, and when travelling she usually (politely but surreptitiously) asks her bartender to give her a quick Beer Glass Masterclass before she makes a fool of herself. Note to readers: bartenders are usually more than happy to provide assistance to a patron who is neatly dressed and polite. And if you're in the ACT, or planning to visit, it's quite easy: middies are the little ones, schooners are the bigger ones, and if there's Guinness on tap you can usually request a pint or half-pint.)
For home use you can get away with martinis, highballs or Collins for tall drinks, old-fashioned for whiskys and other spirits, shots for spirits and liqueurs, and suitable glasses for wines, beers and fortified drinks.
If the occasion is a happy or unexpected one, plastic cups will always work just fine. (Blossom swears by excellent wine in plastic cups with great friends, gorgeous weather and feet dangling in a cool stream.)
Garnishes can be very important. Often they contribute to the flavour, and in some cases they help to define the cocktail. Think of the nutmeg on a Brandy Alexander, or the maraschino cherry in the Manhattan.
Even if the garnish is optional for flavour, it can greatly add to the appeal of a drink—if it is well-chosen and well-presented. Don’t just bung in a straw and an umbrella, think of how the garnish will compliment the drink.
It is advisable to learn how to create the traditional garnishes for your repertoire of personal recipes, and also to research any non-standard options (such as lemon peel or almond-stuffed olives in Martinis).
When creating drinks at home try not to over-do the garnish. It can be very intimidating to receive a drink which is mostly hidden by foliage!
If you are serving cocktails at home, it is polite to ask the recipient before you add a garnish. Allergies aside, some people prefer non-standard garnishes, or no garnish at all.
If you are ordering a drink at a bar, be sure to specify in advance if you would like a non-standard garnish or no garnish. There is no shame whatsoever if you prefer your Martinis to be un-garnished!
If you are presenting somebody with a garnished drink, always provide them with a cocktail napkin or plate on which they can place stalks, umbrellas etc.
It is quite acceptable to eat edible garnishes (including peel) in public. Deposit stalks etc. onto a napkin or plate if it is provided. (If not, then ask for one.) There are no rules about whether you should eat the garnish first, last or at all, it is entirely up to you.
The traditional cocktail hour occurs before dinner is served (as a ballpark aim for between 5 and 7 pm); nowadays Australians often enjoy cocktails as after dinner treats as well.
Cocktails should be avoided during a meal, as the complex flavours and textures may overwhelm the food. Rather, go for wines or beers that will compliment the dish.
It is common at Australian weddings or other functions for ‘cocktails’ to include red, white and sparkling wines, beer, sparkling water and fruit juice. This works well at a function for the sake of simplicity but should not be encouraged for private events. In other words, never invite friends around for ‘cocktails’ and serve wine or beer instead!
Cocktails can work nicely as either aperitifs or digestifs, especially teamed with suitable nibblies.
An aperitif is a beverage, usually alcoholic, that is designed to whet the appetite before the main meal. Avoid overly complex or cream-based drinks as they will quell rather than improve the appetite. Some examples of aperitifs: champagne or sparkling white wine, the Kir, the Martini.
A digestif is a beverage, usually alcoholic and served in small quantities, designed to settle the stomach and promote good digestion after a meal. Avoid strongly acidic drinks, and very large drinks. Some examples of digestifs: Benedictine, Cognac, Grand Marnier, Sauternes.
Very sweet creamy cocktails work best as substitute dessert options (e.g. the Mudslide), or just before retiring to promote relaxation (e.g. the Brandy Alexander).
Why limit cocktails to the cocktail hour? They can be lovely on a hot afternoon before a BBQ, or on a winter’s afternoon to keep the cold at bay. Go for Collins drinks, fizzes and rickeys in hot weather; and punches, toddies and sangarees for colder weather.
To inspire that sense of wicked decadence, you might consider serving cocktails to friends at special occasion breakfasts or brunches. Suitable drinks include revivers such as the Hair Of The Dog or the Prairie Oyster, or appetite-whetters such as the Bloody Mary or the Mimosa.
Here is a little glossary of classic drink styles. Knowing the different types of drinks helps in making and ordering them, and also in inventing your own witty twists.
Buck
A buck is a drink built from a spirit, a squeeze of lemon and a topping of ginger ale in a highball.
Cobbler
A cobbler is a spirit or wine mixed with simple syrup and poured over crushed ice in a wine goblet.
Collins
A base spirit built with lemon or lime, simple syrup and soda water in (obviously) a Collins glass, garnished with a wedge of lemon or lime.
Cooler
Any spirit or liqueur that is topped with carbonated soft drink such as lemonade or Coke.
Fix
A drink built of a spirit with a dash of lemon juice, topped with pineapple juice, served over crushed ice in a highball.
Fizz
Similar to a Collins, a spirit with lemon or lime, simple syrup and soda; however the fizz is served over crushed ice in a goblet and garnished with fresh fruit.
Flip
An alcoholic base (spirit, wine or beer) shaken with a whole raw egg and simple syrup, served with grated nutmeg.
Rickey
A rickey is made with a spirit, fresh lime juice and soda, built over ice in a highball.
Sangaree
A sangaree has a spirit or wine sweetened with syrup or liqueur, garnished with nutmeg.
Sling
Any drink made with a spirit, citrus juice, syrup and soda, and occasionally further sweetened with a liqueur, served over ice in a Collins glass.
Smash
A base of crushed or muddled mint leaves with simple syrup and a spirit, served over crushed ice in an old-fashioned glass and garnished with mint.
Sour
A spirit mixed with lemon juice and simple syrup, garnished with a maraschino cherry in a tumbler.
Toddy
A hot drink made with a spirit, hot water and spices, served in mugs or in Irish Coffee glasses.
Coming soon!
Check this page out later for some of Darla Darling's tips and hints for vintage-inspired style.
Charming Friends,
If you have any clever ideas that you would care to share with other delightfully sophisticated friends, do feel free to send them to us at thedarlingsisters@live.com - and we will reproduce them here so we can all benefit from your wisdom!
XXOO
Darla and Blossom
This is where we can share those cunning little hints that make our fashion lives a bit nicer and easier. Sometimes the smallest little things can make all the difference to our comfort and appearance. So even if it seems obvious, we encourage you to be generous with your knowledge and send your fashion tips to Darla and Blossom at thedarlingsisters@live.com.
Charming Friends,
We are writing this on Melbourne Cup Day, when simply popping on the telly or having a peep at online news sites brings forth some of the very best - and HEAPS of the very worst - of field fashion!
The Darlings believe that a day at the races certainly requires a dressing-up effort, however we are very wary of the way in which many people seem to be interpreting racewear. Our most-hated look? A cheap-looking 'cocktail' frock, far too much fake tan, slicked-down hair with (ugh ugh ugh) a random fascinator clipped awkwardly to one side of the head, giving the distinct impression that the person's brain has just exploded in a puff of cheap and badly-dyed feathers. Add elbow-length gloves (for DAYTIME? with a COCKTAIL FROCK? OUTDOORS?!?!?!) and awkwardly high heels and there you have it - the nastiest outfit that ever frightened a poor horsey.
The Darlings, if we ruled the world of racing fashion, would make sure any ladies who are keen for a day with the gee-gees have in their wardrobe a neat, flattering frock or whimsical suit in a pretty colour, or nicely tailored trousers and a lovely blouse with a comfortable well-suited jacket. We would ensure that their shoes were comfortable, cleaned and not high enough to force ladies to walk like cowpersons (persons-of-cowage?) who hadn't left the saddle for weeks. We would encourage ladies to settle for stockings, a light tan, or their own lovely natural skin (depending on preference and the shoes they favour) and develop the capacity to inform the spray-tan person that this will be quite enough to be going on with, thank you.
We would encourage ladies who wish to wear gloves, especially if their day includes outdoor activities, to find a nice pair of cotton or soft leather daytime gloves, probably wrist length or slightly longer. If the weather is nippy, twenties-style gauntlets look lovely, especially with a good quality coat in a nice neutral or jewel-toned colour.
We would encourage ladies to consider the weather! And come prepared with coats, gloves, scarves, umbrellas, parasols, sunscreen, insect repellant, sunglasses, plenty of water and absolutely anything else they need in order to survive the day with grace.
We would encourage ladies to introduce a touch of whimsy to their outfit, to make it their own and introduce a lighthearted note. What about wearing sweet little Converse shoes in a fab colour with that trouser outfit? How cute, and how comfortable! What about a really adorable and slightly subversive piece of jewellery, such as a spider-shaped brooch or tattoo-inspired earrings? Or, if the weather is cool (as it can often be on Cup Day, especially in lovely Melbourne) how about wearing a faux-fur muff with a purse insert instead of carrying a handbag? Amusing and practical! The possibilities are endless and your fellow racegoers will appreciate it much more than yet another race-clone outfit.
We would encourage ladies to consider their footwear carefully, and ask questions such as: am I expected to stand up for long periods of time? Will I be walking on grass? Will I be wearing the same pair of shoes all day and evening? Will my feet get wet or muddy? Do I need to be able to stand up tomorrow? Can I walk confidently in these or will I lurch unbecomingly and fall over after two glasses of bubbles? Do I need stockings, tights or a pedicure? Will I get sunburned toes or chilblains? Should I invest in some gel or sheepskin inserts? Can I be seen in the cocktail bar/nice restaurant in these?
And when it comes to head-wear? Well! The Darlings would start by encouraging every lady to Make! An! Effort! and at least consider doing something other than the terribly dull slicked-back-ponytail that proiferates at these events. Some ladies have the knack of wearing the slicked-back-ponytail: others, we suspect, simply do it because that is what seems to be expected. Try something different! There are lots of fabulous vintage-inspired hairstyles that do suit modern cuts of all lengths and are much easier to manage than you might think. They are also often designed to accommodate hats and other head-wear. Wouldn't you rather be seen sporting a forties-style Victory roll with a dainty little confection of a hat, or a soft fiftes ultra-glam head of curls with an elegant brimmed hat, or even a thirties-style wave to show off a little feathered, veiled number?
With a carefully styled hairdo, the hair adornment possibilities are suddenly endless. The Darlings tend to think that if you are spending time in the sun, forget the fascinator and look for a brimmed hat - with hatpins or springs to affix it to your head in the wind, natch - so that you can feel cooler and more comfortable (and Blossom urges everybody to remember that sipping champagne in the sun with no head protection is simply a vile hangover by another name).
If you are planning more time in the shade but still outdoors, hats are still a good choice, although sun protection is less of an issue. Please please please do consider something a bit different from the usual cheap straw monstrosity in a horrid colour with nasty things affixed to the brim? Straw hats are light and practical in Australia in spring, but don't head to the local shopping mall to get one: instead, why not support local business and seek out your nearby milliner? You are far more likely to find something suitable, and you may be pleasantly surprised at the reasonable cost, especially as there is no shame whatsoever in wearing the same hat to the races year after year - you can easily vary your look and you may find that your friends greet your beautiful locally-made confection with affectionate joy whenever they see it.
Your milliner can also advise you on the right type of hat for your hair and outfit, and provide advice on how to affix it suitably. If you are planning a little suit, have you considered a sixties-style pillbox? Ladies with short hair, have you ever considered a chic cloche hat? It is a flattering style and looks very nice with short hair. And ladies with very long hair, a piled-up style gives you the ability to wear a little something frothy jauntily pinned to one side.
Now - the dreaded fascinator. We would institute a rule that fascinators can only be worn if a little effort is involved! Sticking one in your hair and calling it done does not count, no indeedy it doesn't ...
Fascinators are really intended for use in done hair. They can look remarkable fixed in an elaborately piled-up 'do'. They also look rather lovely fixed to a hatband as a hat ornament. However, they were originally intended as eveningwear and still give that feeling of after-eight to any outfit. In fact, the Darlings have been known to pop them into carefully styled hair for a formal ball, and certainly to wear them on stage with sequins. Plonked unceremoniously into unstyled hair and worn outdoors at 10 am looks ... well, sorry, but it looks a tad cheap. Especially when the fascinator is one of those horrid shopping-mall numbers made up of badly-dyed chicken feathers and inexpensive sequins in garish colours.
However! If you love fascinators and really want to wear one, here are a few ways to get around it:
Have you considered, rather than a faux-flower fascinator, going for the real thing? A fresh floral fascinator (say that three times quickly!) won't cost much from your local florist and might look especially lovely. All you have to do is order it in advance to make certain that it is fresh and crisp, and it can last all day. This could look so pretty with a suit, and you can have a buttonhole made up to match!
And finally, don't forget that there are myriad other options for dressing your hair on raceday that don't involve hats or fascinators at all! If you want a unique look, consider exploring the wide world of scarves, hairclips, snoods, flowers both real and faux, decorated chopsticks, veils, wigs and even - gosh! - your own lovely hair in an elegant style. With a very good sunscreen and a pretty parasol, you might cheerfully eschew the hat or the fascinator altogether.
Before we go, a quick word to the gentlemen: to a certain extent your lives are much easier. You can wear flat shoes and sensible headwear, you can probably dress with comfort for minimal effort. However, having said this, there seem to be as many poorly-dressed gentlemen as ladies wandering about the tracks! A few pointers for our lovely male Charming Friends:
Finally, Charming Friends, a word from Blossom: please do remember that, while champagne is as much a part of Cup Day as a flutter on the ponies, it is not charming to over-indulge (particularly in the morning) so please do pace yourself, and drink plenty of water throughout the day. Having said that, going out in the evening and watching the zombified stream of Cup Day casualties staggering around, shedding feathers and betting slips, can be rather amusing. Just be certain that you are the well-dressed person sitting well back and observing, while sipping on a cool beverage, and not one of the sad situations heading queasily for Hangover-Land ...
Ladies - and gentlemen - who like to wear nice hosiery come in all shapes, sizes and sensitivities. Sometimes, alas, the actual items do not take all of us into account. If rubbing, chafing, blistering and general ouchiness is a problem for you on occasion, read on - and if you have hints and tips of your own, please contribute them.
Of fishnet fripperies
Fishnet stockings and tights are lovely and can look fabulous. They are the best ever for pulling off that 'vamp' look. They break up an outfit and add a bit of detail. They are incredibly flattering: they make all legs look shapely and hide a multitude of things that you might choose to hide. However, if you have ever worn them for a long period of time, you will know that in a matter of hours, they can make you feel as though you are setting your own legs on fire.
How to deal? Wear something underneath them! If you are wearing covering shoes or boots, pop a pair of socks or sockettes on before you put on the fishnets, to save your tender feet. Failing that, try a pair of tights underneath them!
Shiny, neutral-coloured tights under fishnets can create a sort of magical effect: they make your legs look toned and even. Try wearing shiny neutral tights under skin-coloured fishnets, and see for yourself. The best sort of under-fishnet hosiery is - believe it or not - dance tights. You can get buttery-soft ballet tights - so comfy you may never want to wear anything else - or those fabulous Eighties dance-movie style shiny lycra tights (which look great by themselves as well), at dance shops. They cost a little more but will last and last and last: they are thicker and more flexible than the usual sort ... and, best news of all, you can get them in a large range of sizes. This is especially good news for tall and curvaceous ladies, and for gentlemen who enjoy wearing hosiery - and, gentlemen, if you would like to wear pretty lady-style stockings for an evening but don't want to go to the full effort, dance tights under your fishnets means no need to shave your pins!
Of snapping suspenders and silicone
Stockings - as opposed to tights - are lovely to wear. They look nice and are so ideal for those people who cannot easily find tights that fit. However, whether they are suspender-ready or stay-ups, they can also be a possible Chafing Nightmare! The suspender buttons, silicone stocking-tops, exposed skin in sensitive areas ... all of these things can add up to discomfort, and this can happen to everybody regardless of shape, size or skin sensitivity.
Stay-ups are tremendously convenient - no messing about with suspenders - but there are things you must know before you commit. The first thing to do is check to make sure you don't have a silicone sensitivity. Halfway through a busy day is not the time to discover that your thighs are on fire, covered in rash, blistering or bleeding! Please, do a few hours' skin sensitivity test at home where you can whip them off and apply a soothing lotion before you do yourself a real injury.
The second thing to know is that not all legs are shaped the same, and some will simply not allow stay-ups to stay up. If you are one of these people with gorgeous curvy thighs, congratulate yourself on your voluptuousness and stick to suspenders and tights. There is absolutely nothing worse than running to catch a bus and feeling the stocking-creep ... lower ... lower ... hello world! Some people find that a way around this problem is to purchase stockings that are a size larger than usual, and wear them as high on your leg as possible. If you can do this, it is comfortable and easy, but again try it at home and wander about the house for a few hours first to ake sure they wil stay put.
Suspender stockings are pretty and can look so adorable, especially when you are dancing and a teeny glimpse of suspender is briefly visible as your circle skirt swirls. They can also require circus-quality contortions to put on, snap apart at inopportune times and cause inner-thigh rubbing that will leave you wincing for weeks.
Suspender hose - that is, tights with inbuilt suspenders attached to the waistband - can give all the prettiness without the lumps and bumps of suspenders. And they are easy to wash!
If you do love suspenders, we recommend that you choose a substantial belt (as opposed to the narrow little numbers that can make unexpected reappearances as they slip below your waist at awkward moments), and try to select those that have six suspenders, as opposed to the more common four. Six will hold your stockings more securely, and feel much more comfortable.
If thigh rubbing is a problem for you - as it is for many, many other people - try some tips that ladies used to use before tights were readily available.
Longer knickers look adorable and can be real life-savers. We are talking forties-style French knickers, with longer legs than the boy-short variety that is popular nowadays. They look so pretty, with slightly flared legs and nice little high waists. Sadly they can be tricky to find, but if you can, buy as many as you can afford. You can wear them over your suspender belt, they look very sexy indeed with your stockings peeking out below them, they are really really comfy, they prevent thigh-rub, can be worn under skirts and trousers - and leave no visible knicker-line. Looked at this way, why aren't we all wearing them all the time?
If you can't find them, gentlemen's boxer shorts are a close equivalent - or even those little seamless exercise pants if you don't mind wearing the lycra close to your skin. Or, try pantyhose with most of the legs cut off!
If thigh-rub isn't a dire problem but does bother you a bit, you can try the old talcum powder trick, or there are commercial lotions that are designed to relieve skin chafing. The good thing about these techniques are that they are simple and inexpensive, the tricky thing is that you do need to keep renewing them throughout the day.
Remember, if you have other hints and tips, send them to us and share your wisdom! thedarlingsisters@live.com
As we know, travel ought to be one of the nicest things that we can do - after all, aren't we lucky to have the freedom and the capacity to be able to expand our horizons from time to time?
However the reality is often a little different: travel can be stressful and tiring and irritating. Of course we all feel that way from time to time, but that doesn't mean we have to show it! Sophisticated travellers are ready for any eventuality, and here you will find helpful tips to reduce the stress on the inside and help you to shine on the outside!
Remember, send your tips and hints to Darla and Blossom at thedarlingsisters@live.com.
Of pillowslips and earplugs
The lovely Cindy says:
One travel tip I've read, used and would highly recommend, is to take an empty pillowcase.
The pillowcase can be used for any of the following emergencies:
Oh, and earplugs are a sanity saver! I wear them on transport to avoid noisy mobile phone conversations, or in hotels located right next to a nightclub!
Thank you Cindy! The lovely thing about the pillowslip is that it takes up practically no space in your luggage and weighs very little. A plain cotton blend can be washed and dried easily - and ladies, it can also be used as a washbag for your delicate hosiery and lingerie in those harsh laundrettes. Earplugs are again a marvellous idea and they come in comfortable washable varieties. Make sure they fit you comfortably, wash them regularly, allow them to dry completely and keep them in a clean little case between use.